The gifts that keep on giving

There I was, scanning the several rows of backpacks in a shop in the Arkadia shopping center, trying to spot the perfect one. Something functional, feminine, attractive, and most of all, of good value. I was already close to my budget for my two adopted Christmas kids, and wanted to save some for some little treats for them. Then I saw it, the perfect backpack. Red and black, with plenty of pockets (including one for a water bottle, which I love), and quite sturdy. Plus it was a great price. The fact that it was the last one of its kind on the shelf confirmed to me that yes, this was a great backpack, and today is my lucky day.

I reached out, checked the zippers and pockets just to make sure, and stepped back to admire my find. Just as I went to take it off the hanger, it happened. Another man, who had been lurking nearby for longer than I had been there, swooped in, said something like "ahh haa" with a slight grunt, grabbed the red backpack off the rack and took off running! I was hyena'd!! I, the skillful predator, had my prey, was ready to enjoy the kill, and some dude swooped in and claimed it for himself, running away laughing. Just like a hyena. I was so shocked that I didn't even give chase. I looked around, put my hands up looking for a flag on the play, and simply muttered in disbelief: "what the???"

*****************************************************************************

Last week my new assistant Kasia, informed me of some opportunities to get involved with the Polish community. She is involved in the community service activities of the office, and among other things, PwC works with local organizations to make some Christmas wishes come true for local children who don't have much.  People respond to one or two of their "Letters to Mikołaj" (aka Santa), and get them some nice Christmas presents. This is a perfect way to help out some children in need for the holidays.

Upon scanning the database of letters, using my slowly improving Polish (and getting some help from Kasia), I realized that most of the kids were asking for things they NEED, not things they want. Winter coats, pants, and shoes were much more prevalent than books, toys or anything fun. I used to hate getting clothes for Christmas.  Can you ever remember asking Santa for things you needed? It made me realize how lucky (aka spoiled) I was to ask Santa for Castle Grayskull and Nintendo games, rather than warm socks so my feet don't freeze when I walk to school in the snow.

I decided I needed to adopt a couple kids. Kasia helped me find two that I could help.

Here are their letters, translated:

"My name is Karolina, I am 14 years old and I go to first class of gymnasium (I'm not sure what that means). I live with 3 siblings and my grandmother. I really like to dance and many people tell me I do it well. For Christmas I would like a nice warm winter jacket (the best would be black with a hood). Or shoes, because I don't have any, and a backpack for school because mine is broken."

"Kamil is a lively and energetic 8 year old. I have 3 siblings and we live with our mother. I like to play soccer, and with Legos and cars. I would like a winter coat and warm pants for the winter."

How can you NOT want to help these kids?

So off I go to the mall, looking for coats.  I decided to focus on coats because for me, this is the most important thing for surviving winter. It's been a while since I have bought clothes for anyone, even myself. So I don't know where to start. Plus, I'm not used to all of the brands/stores in Poland.  I must have exchanged 20 texts with Kasia about the best places to buy children's clothes, what the budget should be, and what sizes I should get. She did some research and wrote back telling me that for coat sizes, I should be looking for 160 for the girl, and 140 for the boy. 

So I find some stores with nice winter jackets. I find the styles and prices that I like and look through the sizes. There's one problem.  The sizes are somewhere around 38, 42 and 44. And I'm looking for 140 and 160. What's going on here? Many questions go through my mind.  Do I really need something 100 sizes bigger than what I have in my hand? Is the 1 at the beginning of Kasia's message a mistake? What's wrong with this Polish system??? So I decide to ask the clerk for help.

My first standard question is (in Polish) "Do you speak English?" (normally they say "no"). Of course, she said no this time as well. So here I am trying, in broken Polish, and out comes "dlaczego rozmiar jest 40, ale szukam na 140?" (trying to say "I need size 140, but this is 40...what the heck?" - while showing her the text from Kasia, which is in English). She kind of understands and skeptically explains to me that the jackets there are for "dorosły" (adults), and the size I want is for "dzieci" (kids). AHHH. Ok, so that makes sense. Kinda. But not really. Why are the kids' sizes 100 more than adult sizes? Well, it turns out that the 140 is the size of the kid, in centimeters...so actually, it does make sense! (unless the kid is really fat, then it probably wouldn't work...maybe that's why we don't use that system in the US).

After learning that this store doesn't carry kids' clothes, I searched for at least 2 more hours for something that would work (along the way I got distracted by a grocery store with American food, an electronics store, and an H&M where I bought a red velvet bow tie).

Finally, I found it: Reserved for Kids. This store had great looking puffy winter hooded coats, and they were all on sale...so I could buy the coats with spare room in the budget for some other things on their list.

After buying the coats, I went for the backpack for Karolina, as you already heard about. I actually ended up finding one similar to the one that got hyena'd, so that was nice. Damn hyena. I hope he chokes on some bones.

Finally, since Karolina had two gifts, I needed to get Kamil another one from his list. I thought about fulfilling his request for winter pants, but I have no idea how to pick pants. Especially winter pants. Does that mean snow pants?  Or sweats?  Or warm pants?  How do I know if they are warm without trying them on?  And how can I try on kid's pants?  Who knows.  I haven't even bought new pants for myself since I moved here (hopefully you can't tell), so I decided to get him something fun instead.

Have you been to a toy store lately? If not, you should go...because it was great! I spent a good 30 minutes playing with everything...until I started getting hungry.  I looked for my mom to tell her I wanted to eat, then I realized that my mom isn't there and I'm 33 years old.  Damn.  So I decided to go with Legos, since he wrote about them in his letter (although he didn't ask for them, I'm sure he will enjoy them). And today at a workshop in the office, we played with Legos (really!). So it was a sign.  The fire truck Lego set is perfect for an 8 year old...I kinda want one for myself, to be honest. It has a big truck, a trailer, and a little boat.  Who knows, maybe one day he'll be inspired to be a fireman and he'll end up saving some lives (and cats from trees).

That's the kind of gift that keeps on giving.

Now I just need some help wrapping them!

I know many of you are involved with various charity events throughout the year, and that's GREAT.  But if you haven't done so already, please consider doing something charitable this holiday season, since there are so many people in greater need than we are.  Thanks! :)

Thanksgiving Sunday

Thanksgiving is definitely my favorite holiday of the year.  Mostly because it's a time to reflect on what we can appreciate in our lives, but also because Christmas lost points after my parents stopped giving me cool presents like Transformers and Nintendo games. But really, I definitely have a lot to appreciate.

Even though I have at least 1,000 new grey hairs since I moved to Poland, I couldn't be happier about how it has gone.  Great new friends, new places to travel, wonderful visitors (and I am still accepting more), new cultures and experiences, and of course, unlimited vodka drinking practice.  Of course I'm also thankful for my family and friends back home, our collective health, and the fact that our Maui condo hasn't been flooded by any of the threatening tsunamis. 

But really, my favorite part of Thanksgiving the past 2 years has been sharing it with people from so many countries.  Last year, 8 people came over for my first Turkey ever.  This year, there were 18. 

Needless to say, we didn't all fit around the table

I don't know why I thought 18 people would eat comfortably in my apartment, but then I thought it's Thanksgiving, and you never eat comfortably on Thanksgiving.  There's never elbow room when your entire extended family is gathered around the table, and after 30 minutes of shoveling food you are too stuffed to move anyway.  So, who cares if it's crowded!

I thought that at least some people would turn down the invitation, but it turns out everyone was just as excited for it as I was. 
I don't know if I'll be here next year for Thanksgiving, but I'll definitely have another Thanksgiving dinner, even if it has to be in September. 

This year's roster included:

- 7 Poles
- 2 Bulgarians
- 2 Romanians
- 1 British/Ecuadorian/Who knows what he is
- 1 Italian
- 1 Latvian
- 4 Americans
- 1 French Christmas tree

Francois, the French Christmas tree (check out his Movember moustache)

Among the amazing food that everyone brought, we had:

- Turkey and gravy
- Tofurkey and veggie gravy
- Chicken drumsticks
- Mashed Potatoes
- Stuffing
- Cranberries
- Moussaka
- Baked pierogi that aren't really pierogi
- Carrot casserole
- Cous cous salad
- Chicken salad
- Greek salad
- More salad
- Wine/beer
- Vodka (for a Polish twist)
- Tiramisu
- Pineapple/pine-nut cake (a recipe Tyler invented based on a line out of Mad Men)
- Pumpkin pie

Turkey bathing in the brine

12 pound turkey too big for the pan

Done!

Pumpkin pie for 18

I think I'm forgetting some things because when I look at the picture of my plate, everything is piled on top of each other, so you can't see everything!  But you get the idea...it was a FEAST, surrounded by great people and good laughs...just like Thanksgiving should be. 

Plate #1 of many

This is how we all felt...classic Thanksgiving

 

Already looking forward to next year :))))  Maybe we can fit even more next time. 

Český Krumlov, Czech Republic

Another work trip to Prague meant another trip of goulash and beer. But this time I also wanted to try something different. Instead of flying in early to sightsee within Prague, I wanted to take a trip outside of the city. I already made plans to stay with Calley (friend who used to live in Warsaw) in her great apartment with Ela (Warsaw friend who was also visiting Calley), and Calley also cooked for a few of us on another night. I also had a big week of training with a lot of networking to do, and visiting with some old friends. I was really looking forward to the week, but I also wanted to do something else in Prague that I had never done before. Leave it to Pavla and Martin to come up with a great idea.

Charles Bridge at night

I met Pavla and Martin back in April when Sherry and Jessica visited, and Pavla invited us to their party. It was a great party on their street, and ever since then they have always met me when I visited Prague for dinner or drinks. If you ever go to Prague, they will take care of you! They've already taken care of Meg and Robyn when they visited Prague, even when I wasn't there. And by "taken care of" I mean "got them really drunk on Czech beer and shots".

Anyway, Pavla had the idea of going to Cesky Krumlov for a day. She had never been, and Martin had been there a couple weeks before and had an entire itinerary planned out...and he had a car, which was the only reason we invited him great. He didn't party the night before (which is more rare than a stranger in Moscow actually helping me) so he would be able to drive us early in the morning. I have to really thank him for this because the trip was great, and as usual, I fell asleep in the car (I always fall asleep if I am in the car for more than 20 minutes...I blame my parents for that). Their friend Olinka was also with us, so there were plenty of people to keep up the conversation (I only slept for 20 minutes or so, I think) :). Olinka told Pavla she was nervous about meeting me because she isn't so confident in her English, but she was super friendly and nice, and she understood most everything I said. This was obvious because she always laughed at my jokes when nobody else would (clearly she was the only one who understood). 

On the way, we stopped by Hluboka, home to a recently renovated English castle. You can tell the design is pretty recent because there wasn't really any fortification there.  But it was really nice, clean and great for taking jumping pictures. It was a gorgeous day, and combined with the changing leaves, it might have been the perfect day for this trip.

Getting hit in the face by a pile of leaves during a jumping picture

Martin attempting a death-defying jumping picture

  

Don't ask me why Olinka is laying on the ground

  

Since we were following Martin's itinerary, we stopped at the Czech restaurant that he found on his last trip...and it had great local food, and of course, shots of Becherovka (an herbal liquor that goes down pretty nice). Martin chugged 2 non-alcoholic Czech beers faster than I could finish my one shot.

My roast pork and dumplings

Finally we arrived in Cesky Krumlov in the early afternoon, where we were able to spend a few hours walking around, shopping, and taking lots of pictures. If you ever have a few days in Prague, you should check this place out. It took about 2.5 hours to get there, and it was well worth it. We didn't spend the night (but could have), as it was possible to do it all in a day trip. If you go in the Summer, apparently a lot of people raft/canoe down the river so you could take a couple days.

The "Cesky" in Cesky Krumlov is to differentiate it from a different town also called "Krumlov" in another region (this one is in Bohemia as opposed to Moravia). At least that's what Martin told me. He could be lying. Actually, I just checked, he's not lying. Or I should say "I just Czeched". 

Kids these days take pictures with their iPads

This is the old moat, where instead of water, they had bears (look closely!)

The city is very small, made up of a beautiful Old Town and a nice castle across the river. The views are stunning...I didn't know which way to take pictures because in every direction the view was amazing; from high, from low, from the tower, from the hill, from the riverbed, from the bridges, from the women's bathroom (oh no, that's in the Hancock Tower in Chicago). Again, it was a combination of the beauty of the city, the blue skies and the colorful leaves.

Could this be the best view?

Or maybe this?

Or this?

 

Moon rising over the river

Heading out of the city under the bridge structure thingy (that's the official name)

In the end, the day was great, and it was nice to spend time with friends. The week of training was also great, I saw a lot of old friends and met a lot of great people from all over CEE. I don't know what it is about Prague, but every time I go, I always come back a very happy guy.

Some of my class at our celebration dinner

Halloween weekend bucket list

November 1 is a holiday in Poland (All Saint's Day) and since it was a Tuesday this year, most people took Halloween off as well to make a 4-day weekend. It's great to have the day after Halloween off, since normally there are big parties on Halloween. However, I've discovered here that Halloween is not that big of a party, not many people dress up, and most people leave the city to be with their families. So I wasn't all that concerned if I missed Halloween and went out of town. Plus it seems like a waste to not travel when you have a 4 day weekend and limited time in Europe.  I was about to click "buy" for a ticket to Rome for 3 nights, but just as I did, the price went up by quite a bit, as if it was a sign to stay in Warsaw and do some other things I haven't done yet. Thus the creation of my Halloween weekend bucket list.

Halloween weekend bucket list item #1: Try a new restaurant

A while ago I walked past this restaurant called Browar de Brasil. It's a brewery, and it's Brazilian (if you couldn't figure it out). And when it comes to Brazilian restaurants, you know that there will be lots of meat. Of the all-you-can-eat variety, aka Churrascaria. And of course I got that. The meat was pretty good, fairly cheap ($20 including sides), and the service was extremely friendly (they were Brazilian, not Polish).  In fact, when I arrived I tried to speak Polish and the guy didn't understand me...and when he spoke back I didn't understand him.  Turns out it's because he is Brazilian and his Polish is worse than mine! The restaurant itself was a very fun environment too (maybe because the waitresses were dressed in cheerleader outfits). I even tried the chicken hearts, which the waiter called "Brazilian Viagra". He said "If you pop 4 of these, after a few minutes the table will lift off the ground". No joke. I only had 1.5.

Meat and cheerleaders

HW bucket list item #2: Take a day trip out of Warsaw

There are many places in Poland that I want to visit, but haven't been to, and hopefully I will start knocking these off soon. For this trip, a friend suggested Torun. Everyone says Torun is a great place to visit (and live), and it's even very high on the list of top Eastern European cities, not just in Poland. Some of the big draws are the medieval city center, the 13th century castle ruins of the Teutonic Knights (Poland and the Teutonics fought over the city in the 15th century), the fact that it's still mostly original (it wasn't damaged during WWII), and that it's where Copernicus was born back in 1473. Over time, Torun has been passed back and forth between Teutonics, Poland, Russia, Prussia, and Germany (and probably others).

Old Teutonic 13th century castle ruins 

Toruń Old Town

So I decided to go to Torun for the day. I was accompanied by a friend, who wishes to be unnamed, due to the following story.  I won't get into too much details about the train situation, but she (who is Polish) might be worse than me at buying train tickets. First, she was confused as to which station we were to leave from so we had to change our plans before we even left.  After we got to the right station, we ended up waiting on the wrong platform (good thing the train was late and we realized it before it arrived). Then we got on the wrong wagon, had to get off to switch wagons, then finally we got to our seat. Except someone was in our seat. So my unnamed friend spoke to the person saying "that's our seat".  And the guy said "yes, this was your seat...2 days ago"....because we had tickets for the 27th...and it was the 29th!  Whoops.  "Someone" (not me) bought the ticket for the wrong day. So we ended up sitting in the wagon corridor, which wasn't so bad.  She felt really bad, but honestly it was no big deal at all.  At least we were on the train. When the ticket taker came by, I think she greased him so we didn't have to buy 2nd tickets, but wouldn't tell me exactly what happened. Maybe someday I will teach her how to order train tickets in Polish, since I am so good at it.

Me in the corridor

Neighbor enjoying a pickle in the corridor

My unnamed guide

HW bucket list item #3: Buy a bottle of sriracha

Done. Times two. The second one is garlic flavored. Imagine taking sriracha and mixing in garlic. Yes, it's awesome.

Regular and garlic sriracha

HW bucket list item #4: Bowl in Halloween costume

A group of 9 of us met at a bowling alley, half of us in costumes. It was a fun night of bowling, even though everyone was exhausted from the night before. In any case, it's hard to bowl in a sumo outfit. I don't even think I broke 100.

Not so good...

Sumo and Smurfette

Little devil and a cat, although you can't really tell she is a cat here

HW bucket list item #5: See a part of the city I haven't seen before

This one was a combination of sightseeing and cultural experience. Every November 1 (All Saint's Day), the entire Polish population visits the cemeteries around Poland to pay tribute to the dead (ancestors, famous people, random people with pretty tombstones, etc). Dominika organized a group to go at night to Powąski cemetary, which was pretty impressive. There were thousands of people in the cemetery, walking around the entire cemetery, like it was some sort of museum. There were candles and flowers everywhere, and it really impressed me how important this day is to them. This is part of the reason that Halloween isn't highly celebrated...because most people are in mourning during this time, spending time with their families. Thinking back to the US, I have probably been to cemeteries less than 5 times to "visit" graves, and one of those times was to find Bruce Lee.

Candles all around the cemetery

It can be a bit spooky

HW bucket list item #6: Book my next trip

I will be spending my Christmas eating pizza and spaghetti in...Rome!

Overall, you can see that the weekend was a pretty big success.  Other bonuses from the long weekend include an unforgettable (but forgotten) night out at Opera Club, watching the last Harry Potter in poor quality streaming on my computer (my slow internet basically ruins my life), finishing the last season of Friday Night Lights (BEST SHOW EVER), starting Season 2 of Glee, and finally getting a bit of rest.

A conversation Mom and Dad didn't have about their trip to Poland

In the early evening, just before dinner on the first night of their Mediterranean cruise, Cheryl and Fred Sakura reminisce about their recent trip to Poland to visit their oldest son, Tristan. This conversation is entirely true. Except for some of the parts that are false.

Dad and Mom at the Palace on the Water

Mom: I had so much fun on our week-long trip to see Tristan...Warsaw and Krakow were very nice places...I had high expectations after the way our dear son described it, but it was even better than I thought

Dad: Yea it was great. And very nice of him to give up his bed for us, even though he hurt his shoulder sleeping on the sofa.

Mom: He's such a nice boy. The perfect son really.

Dad: Did Tristan tell you to say that?

Mom: Of course not. I thought of it all by myself.

Dad: If it wasn't so far away, I'd like to visit Poland more often. And all of his friends in the US should visit too.  And SOON!!

Mom: I'm already thinking about going again next Spring

Dad: Let's just try to get more adjusted to the time change before we go.

Mom: Yea, you kept falling asleep in the middle of the day, like on the bus and in the movie theater...and waking up often in the middle of the night.

Dad: I think it was that darn red-eye flight from Seattle. I couldn't sleep on the flight and it just ruined me for the first few days.

Mom: But the red eye is the best option to get there. And Tristan was nice enough to take some time off work to meet us at the airport. It's a good thing he did because we couldn't pronounce the name of his street to tell the taxi.

Dad: Yea, it was nice of him. But I think he just wanted to make sure his suitcase of snacks arrived safe and sound. He really likes his Stacy's pita chips and Pace picante sauce.

Mom: And the Jif peanut butter, the curry, the stuff for s'mores...

Goodies that Mom and Dad brought Tristan

Dad: You really liked his apartment, right? And it was nice that he had wireless internet. I don't know why he complains so much about getting it set up. It seemed to work fine.

Mom: Yes, I love his apartment. And it's a good about the internet too, because without it, I don't know how we'd pull up city maps or book tours in Krakow on my fancy iPad.

Dad: Or update our Facebook statuses.

Mom: I wonder if Tristan was happy that we took so long to get ready in the morning that we normally didn't leave the apartment until after noon

Dad: Well, even though he went out late at night, he kept waking up early to get ready to go

Mom: Yea, I think he thought we wanted to get early starts to the days

Dad: Well, now he knows...we're retired! We don't do early starts. What are you laughing at?

Mom: I was just thinking about all the times I kept turning the toilet paper roll around so it rolls away from you instead of towards you, because I know how much it annoys him. I wonder if he found it.

Dad: That was you? I was going to do the same thing! I'm sure he found it, if you kept doing it over and over, he must have been turning it back around.

(Mom and dad give each other high-fives)

Mom: I love playing jokes on him. I also wrote "Mom" with my finger in the shower so he'll see it when the shower steams up.

Dad: So he'll think of "Mom" when he takes a shower? That's kinda weird.

Mom: ...Ok let's change the subject.

Dad: Yea, let's talk about my new camera. I was very happy to use it to take pictures all over the city

Mom: You took pictures of everything; the Old Town, the Hard Rock Cafe, the grocery store, butts, and even all our meals

Pictures in the Hard Rock Cafe

Pictures in the grocery store

Pictures in H&M

Picture of a butt

Dad: I know, it's awesome to take pictures of food...all the cool people do it. I mean, you've seen Tristan's mobile uploads on Facebook, right? They're awesome!

Mom: And his awesome jumping pictures. Remember my jumping picture at the Grand Canyon?

(Another high-five)

Mom jumping over the Grand Canyon in 2010

Dad: Anyway, we ate some nice meals so I wanted to capture them.

Mom and her food

Mom: You're right. I finally got to eat one of those tasty waffles everyone in Old Town was eating. And I really liked the pierogis, and you liked the golonka right?

Dad: Yes, the golokna was very nice...I still dream about that 1 kilo chunk of pork meat. By the way, it's "pierogi".

Mom: That's what I said

Dad: No, you said pierogis. Pierogi is already plural, so you don't need to add an "s" to it.

Mom: Oh, look at you Mr Polish speaker. You shouldn't talk. What did you call that restaurant we went to with Tristan's friends from work? Chel-awp-skee Jahd-low?

Dad: That's how it's spelled! "Chłopskie Jadło". I pronounced it exactly how it's spelled.

Mom: Exactly wrong, you mean. Speaking of dinner, Agata, Moni, and Kuba were very nice...he seems to be in good hands here.

Dad: Chellll-awwwwp-skeeee.....

Mom: Maybe if you could pronounce words correctly, the lady at Carrefour wouldn't have yelled at you

Dad: I didn't do anything at Carrefour! I think she thought I was stealing gum, but she only spoke Polish

Mom: Why would she think that? You must have been doing something suspicious

Dad: I don't know...maybe she was just jealous that I had teeth to be able to chew gum, and she didn't have any teeth.

Mom: That makes no sense. And don't be mean.

Dad: I'm not...but I can just understand the stress that Tristan went through when he first arrived. It can be intimidating.  At least he seems to be adjusted now.  I still can't get over that we couldn't dry our clean clothes in a dryer. 

Mom: Yea, and I'm very impressed that he can speak Polish to the waiters, taxi drivers and at the train station.

Dad: He's probably just making up random sounds so WE think it's Polish, even though it's just gibberish and nobody understands him. I mean, I can also say "czszywzczzczassszzzz" like he said.

Mom: No, you can't. But you're right.  We should have asked his friend Kasia to test his Polish in front of us

Dad: Speaking of Kasia, it was really nice of her to give us the tour of Old Town and of the Uprising Museum

Nun texting in Old Town

Mom: Yea, Kasia was great. At first I was hoping that Tristan could join us, but then it was nice to hang out with just her. I didn't miss Tristan at all.

Dad: Who's Tristan?

Mom: No idea. But we definitely learned a lot about what Poland went though during and after World War II.

Dad: I never knew about all that, and it's very inspiring that they wanted to rebuild the city after the total destruction.

Mom: Yea, we'll have to re-watch the movie "The Pianist" so see if we can connect some of the stories.

Dad: And going to Auschwitz was so intense and emotional.

Mom: Yea, I am glad that we went. And to Krakow and the salt mines.

Krakow

Dad: Oh, I loved licking the salty walls in the Salt Mine!

Mom: (shaking head)

Dad: What?

Mom: I told you not to do that.

Dad: But the other kids were doing it!

Mom: So you decided it would be a good idea to lick a salty wall that other kids just licked?

Dad: Uhhh, errrr. Yea?  My tongue reaches higher than theirs. 

Mom in the salt mines

Mom: Anyway, What else did you love about the trip, that's not going to make me sick to my stomach?

Dad: I'm really happy that we saw Wilanow Palace, Lazienki Park...and the fountain light show...that was really neat, even though I was falling asleep while standing up.

Chopin monument at Lazienki Park

Mom: Me too. And the film "Bengali Detective" at the Warsaw Film Festival was a fun experience.

Dad: Yea, we should do that kind of thing more often

Mom: And I just liked walking around the city and people watching.

Dad: Me too

Mom: I noticed that the girls here are much better looking than the guys. No wonder Tristan likes it...since he's so tall, funny and handsome.

Dad: Yes, very tall, funny, and handsome, just like me.  So he must get lots of chicks.

Mom: (silence)

Dad: (holding up his right hand) Am I right??? High-five???

Mom: (walking away) I think it's time for dinner now...

Tristan would like to thank his mom and dad for coming to visit, for bringing all the snacks and treats and for taking me out to eat every day...I felt like a kid again. Love you guys and I hope to see you soon!

Beer, tents, and lederhosen: 10 things I learned at Oktoberfest 2011

Exhausted, after a combined 16 days in Turkey and Tallinn, I landed around 9:30pm in Munich. I waited for my suitcase at baggage claim, looking forward to checking into the hotel and taking a nap. Mike and Patty were coming a bit later, but I had time to rest before they arrived.  Then, as is normal when I travel, something unfortunate happened.  My bag decided to spend the night in Copenhagen instead of coming to Munich. I hate that feeling when the last bag is picked up and the carousel stops moving.  And you are still standing there all alone like a loser.  You look around the half-empty claim area and anyone nearby looks at you and just knows..."sucks to be that guy".  I was really irritated and the first airport person I asked for help wouldn't help me (and spoke to me in that really annoying polite/condescending way that makes you mad, but you can't really be mad because they were polite). The next person was very helpful and told me that my bag would arrive in the morning. At this point, I didn't care, I just wanted to sleep. I didn't need my suitcase for that.

And thus began the weekend where I learned 10 things to make for a successful Oktoberfest:

1. Wear awesome clothes

Mike and Patty (US friends who live in London) arrived about an hour after I got to the Marriott Courtyard hotel in the city center. Since I didn't have other clothes, I decided to wash my clothes in the sink while I waited for them. When they arrived, we decided to go for a drink. I only had the 2XL plain white t-shirt that the airline gave me, so that's what I wore out. While everyone else in the city was wearing lederhosen and dirndls, I was in a semi-transparent white t-shirt that was 3 sizes too big. I looked awesome. 

It's like a dress

2. By awesome clothes, I meant lederhosen or dirndls

The next day, since I didn't have clothes, and since we wanted to buy lederhosen anyway, we set off to do some shopping. A couple hours (and 130 euros) later, we had outfits. Some places were charging up to 260 Euros for a complete outfit, but I was not ready to spend that much. I don't even spend that much on real clothes.  I went for a cheaper pair of leather pants and a pink shirt.  Patty had a pink dress, so we looked like twins.  She didn't mention our potential matching outfits before I bought it because she didn't want me to spend anymore time trying to decide what to get.  Usually the guy is the one saying "yea yea looks good" (without looking), to make the girl hurry up and buy stuff so he can go home to watch football. 

At this point, I realized that I didn't even need my suitcase because I was going to wear this same outfit all weekend anyway...

Heading out in our new outfits

3. Watch your step

Munich during Oktoberfest is much different than it was during the Christmas markets last year. There are people dressed in costumes everywhere, everyone is drunk, I saw 2 people projectile vomiting (one almost got hit by a train when he leaned over to let it out), and I stepped over countless puddles of who-knows-what (on sidewalks, train tracks, in elevators, etc). Even with all the drunkenness, it definitely felt friendlier and more civilized than Queen's Day in Amsterdam (that might be hard to believe based on this initial description). The Germans must be polite drunks (not like in the movie "Beerfest").

Outside the tents

4. Bring friends from around the world

After we were dressed, we walked the 20 minutes to the Oktoberfest tents to meet recently engaged cousin Karen and her fiance Daniel, who were visiting from Boston with Daniel's Harvard B-School class, and friends Jen and Jeff, who are from the US, but recently moved to Zurich with PwC. Afterwards, we met Francis (PwC friend who lives in London) who stayed with us, and after dinner, we met up with Seif (Egyptian friend who used to live in Warsaw) and a few of his friends (they all live in Germany now). We had a couple drinks at a youth hostel that has a cheap and casual bar near the Marriott.

On day 2, Kate (from my St Pete and Barcelona trips) met us there with her friend Anna. They had gotten in from Dusseldorf the night before and were well rested for this big day. They only did one day of Oktoberfest, so they planned to go big (and they did, lasting nearly 15 straight hours). Eerik and Asia (who used to live in Warsaw but now live in Munich) met us for a bit, and another friend Melissa (from Chicago) was in town with some of her work friends. Later that night we met up with EJ (who lives in Amsterdam now) and Debashis, an American friend who lives in Warsaw.  Is was great to see so many international friends in one place!

Francis and Anna wondering if Kate is going to share

5. Get to know your neighbors

We first stopped by Hippodrome, but it was packed. I didn't really know what to expect with these tents...there are people EVERYWHERE, the wooden tables packed elbow to elbow, waitresses running around carrying huge plates of food, or up to 10 1-liter steins of beer. The bands play cheerful music and everyone stands up to sing. And every once in a while some guy (or girl) will stand on the table and chug their liter. Or get booed if they tried and failed.

The atmosphere was a lot of fun, as everyone makes friends with everyone else, and it was even more crowded since it was the weekend. You definitely don't get much personal space.  And not everyone wears deodorant. 

How does she carry all those at once?

We met lots of old and new friends, including this old Italian guy who kept kissing me

If you do this, you get cheered

6. Stay out of the way

The thing that impressed me the most is that with so many drunk people, and with people coming and going constantly, and with all the food and drink orders, they keep it VERY organized. Even though it's packed, it doesn't seem packed. The walk ways are always clear, people are not lingering around, lines move quickly, and it seems like they are always in control. That's why we got yelled at by security many times on the first day. We were dumb Oktoberfest virgins standing in the way.  We stood there because it was clear and spacious...which apparently is because they don't let anyone stand there!  Makes sense.

Packed in Hippodrome

7. Get there early

On the Friday, we didn't have a table reservation (even though I started the process of trying to get one back in May), but we ended up finding seats in the Spaten tent at around 2pm. We only had it for a couple hours because the table was reserved after 4pm. That was fine, because at least we had enough time to eat and have a couple beers.

After a failed attempt to bribe someone to go into another tent to get seats, we did some bumper cars and walked around the amusement park (the bribe worked, as he took the money, but we didn't get seats). Instead of going back into the tents, we decided to go to Marienplatz and eat at Hofbrauhaus, a place that I went to with Mike, Pascale, and Lukasz last year. It's a great atmosphere with good food and big beers (almost like a year-round Oktoberfest).

The next day (Saturday), we got to the tents at 8am to get a good spot in the Lowenbrau tent. And 8am was almost too late! There were hundreds of people already in line, and we got one of the last tables with a 5pm reservation (meaning we could stay there til about 4:30). Chen was very aggressive in securing us the tables on both days, as there are hundreds of people fighting for each of them.

Daniel, Karen, Patty, Mike, Jeff, Jen, and me in Spaten

8. Hope the airline loses your suitcase

Because of my lost suitcase for 24 hours, the airline will reimburse me for all toiletries and underwear that I must buy. I got some deodorant and toothpaste and some hot new boxer briefs. Literally, it's really hot down there. They'll also reimburse for half of my clothes, so hopefully they feel like lederhosen is a necessary purchase. I mean, it's clothes I had to have!

9. Eat a lot of pretzels

It absorbs the beer. And this is the proper way to do it:

 The secret to Oktoberfest survival - eat lots of pretzels

10. Do some sightseeing

And by sightseeing, I mean "look up at the buildings as you walk from beer tent to beer tent". You might see something nice.

Oh yea, we did some sightseeing too (kinda)

It took me a few days to recover and re-hydrate myself. But it was definitely a fun trip and I would love to go back again next year!!  Who's coming with me???