Adventures in grocery shopping

NOTE: Any Polish friends reading this are more than welcome to take me shopping next time so I know what the heck I am doing when I go into one of these stores!

I love grocery shopping. In SF, my idea of a fun evening after work was to go to Target, Trader Joe's and Safeway (yes, to all 3) to get all the best deals on my staple items. Each place had good deals on certain things so it was worth it to go to all three. Soy milk and canned soup at Target, Fruits and Veggies at TJs, and bread, meat, and tortillas at Safeway (when on Club Card special). I had a perfect system which saved me hundreds of pennies every month.  Don't be jealous. 

Oh how times have changed.

There are 3 main challenges that I've had (and will continue to have) with grocery shopping here:

1. Everything is priced in zloty/kg, so I can't figure out what's a good deal

2. I can't read any of the labels, and

3. I need "training" on how to shop

1. I have recently figured out that the easy way to convert zloty/kg to $/pound is to divide by 6. It's not exact, but it's close. This works for things like meats, fruits, and veggies (which I actually have still not purchased...see below). Things are generally cheaper here than in the US, which is good. However, I still cannot figure out zl/mL or why all servings are described "per 100 grams". In these cases, not knowing if I am getting a good deal really takes some of the excitement out of grocery shopping.

2. Ok, so I cannot read Polish. We all know that. But it is a bit of a joke when I am looking at something and can't figure out if it is a seasoning, a gravy, or a freeze dried vegetable...then it turns out to be powdered soup. I also don't know how to prepare anything after I buy it (the directions are in Polish, German, Russian, Arabic, Martian, etc). So it might as well be a freeze dried vegetable, because it's going to taste like one after I cook it wrong.

3. I have made, or will make a fool of myself because...:

a. You have to weigh your own produce and put a label on it before taking it to the register. I did not remember that rule and when I brought some bananas up, the cashier scoffed at me, swore at me in Polish (I can only assume), and ran off to the produce section to weigh it and put a label on. I still don't know how to actually do it myself, but for my own safety, I'm pretty sure I better learn. There is usually a person by the produce to help you, but that makes it even scarier because then I will have to try to speak Polish to them (which will limit my produce buying to the 3 things I know how to say - banana, apple, and tomato). This is why I have yet to buy any other produce since those bananas.

b. Apparently bags are not provided when making your purchases.  The cashier just puts all your stuff on the other side of the counter and it is up to you to stack everything on your own arms, or bring your own bag. Did anyone warn me about this before? Nope. I didn't have any bags on me, and at this point, I didn't know you had to pay for them. When I was standing there clueless staring at my purchases, the cashier was already helping the next customer, leaving all my stuff just scattered. I didn't know how to say "hey lady, are you going to bag my stuff?" so natually I just stared at them, hoping they would bag themselves. Then she ran off to do something and I was there alone (the guy behind me already paid and left, and I was still standing there). I saw a bunch of plastic bags hanging from a rack so I took one, thinking I could do this myself. And I put my stuff in it. And I leave.

The next time I went into that store, she did the same thing, putting my purchases on the counter, but no bag. I had quite a bit of stuff now, so obviously I couldn't carry it out by hand. So I motioned like I wanted a bag. She gave me one bag, then charged me 7 cents!!  I had at least 3 bags' worth of stuff, so I motioned "maybe I need another one, lady, can't you see I have a lot of stuff?" So she "sold" me another one. I decided to make it work because I'm sure she remembers me from the banana incident. Only then did I realize that the last time, I actually STOLE the bag. I'm sure people saw me, and they probably think I waited for the cashier to leave her station so I could take a bag and run out!! I am a wanted criminal in Poland!!!! But at least now I know. And now you know.  I will give her an extra 7 cents next time. 

c. The meat counter is very intimidating. There are all kinds of meats, sausages, and cold cuts, with a scary looking lady behind it, with her hair in a net and a cleaver in her hand. This is not the friendliest looking person in the world. That isn't that unusual though...the main problem (in addition to the prices being in zl/kg) is that I don't know what anything is. And the Polish labels don't help (obviously). I have been into this store 3 times, and I still have yet to order any meat. Oh, I go for a look. But I don't order anything. I just look quickly (and longingly), and when she looks like she is about to say something to me, I run away. I'm too nervous to order! (just like I ran away right after I took this picture)

The other day my boss gave me a book that helps you learn Polish words through pictures. There is actually a picture of a butcher shop with words for everything...so next time I will be bringing this book with me, and will hopefully be able to order some meat. Everything will have to be in the exact same spot as the picture though...

Or I might just buy my groceries online.

The good news from all of these adventures in grocery shopping is....my question has been answered!!!!!!!!! YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS. Now I just need to find Pace Picante sauce.